the proper basis for relationships

ryan and alex

 

In fellowship with others,
embody the principles of the Sage.

 
This hexagram addresses the proper basis for relationships with others. It generally comes as a sign that some kind of self-correction is in order in this arena.

Proper relationships, whether in love, work, family, or friendship, must be founded on and conducted under proper principles in order to succeed. Our model for how to behave with others is the Sage: in relating we are obliged to practice kindness, humility, correctness, equanimity, and openness. Wherever we depart from these we lose the aid of the Higher Power and risk and encounter with misfortune.

The fundamental rule of the I Ching for the conduct of relationships is that they take place in the open. This means that every facet of a relationship should be seen as fair and correct by everyone concerned, not just yourself. It also means that it is improper to enter into or continue in relationships with unspoken reservations or hidden intentions.

Exceptional things can be accomplished by those who come together correctly in fellowship now under the guidance of an enlightened leader or leaders. Seek that role by patterning yourself after the Sage. Meet others halfway in a spirit of sincerity and receptivity. Give trust where it is due; where it is not, do not resort to harshness – reserve and reticence are adequate measures. Avoid the formation of factions and cliques, and correct your errors in relationships as soon as you become aware of them.  In this way you can accomplish magnificent deeds now.
 

The I Ching, or Book of Changes

Hexagram 13, T’ung Jen / Fellowship with Others

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know the universe as yourself

the explanet zoo

 

Favor

and disgrace are

equally problematic. Hope

and fear are phantoms

of the body.

 

What

does it mean that

“favor and disgrace are

equally problematic”? Favor

lifts you up; disgrace knocks you down.

Either one depends on the opinions

of others and causes you to

depart from your

center.

 

What

does it mean that

“hope and fear are phantoms

of the body”? When you regard your

body as your self, hope and fear have real

power over you. If you abandon the

notion of body as self, hope

and fear cannot

touch you.

 

Know

the universe as

your self, and you can live

absolutely anywhere in comfort.

Love the world as your self,

and you’ll be able

to care for it

properly.

 

Tao te Ching of Lao Tzu

Chapter 13

 

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Hua hu Ching, and Art of War for

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or Android

 

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years of hunger beneath gojo bridge


 

master’s

handiwork cannot

be measured but still priests wag

their tongues explaining the “Way” and

babbling about “Zen.” This old monk has

never cared for false piety and my

nose wrinkles at the dark smell

of incense before the

Buddha.

 

Crazy Cloud

speaks of Daito’s unsurpassed

brilliance but the clatter of royal carriages

about the temple gates drowns him out and no

one listens to tales of the Patriarch’s long

years of hunger and homelessness

beneath Gojo

Bridge.

 

Ikkyu

wikkyu

 

In order to deepen his Zen understanding, Daito Kokushi (also known as Shuho Myocho, 1281-1338), the founder of Daitoku-ji, passed a number of years hiding out among the beggars clustered about Kyoto’s Gojo Bridge.

the calm light from the spirit

nothing in particular

 

Do not

do anything (good or bad)

and do not even do this not-doing;

then straightaway one reaches that place where

there is no concern for external affairs, that

vast and peaceful place where there

are absolutely no obstructing

thoughts.

 

There,

all thoughts of the past

are extinguished, all thoughts of

the future do not arise, and

all present thoughts

are void.

 

Nevertheless,

this void-ness is also not

to be maintained. This non-maintenance

(of the void) is also to be forgotten, and this forgetting

is also not to be legitimized; further, free your­self from this

non-legitimizing. At the time when even the idea of

getting free is not preserved, only the alert

yet calm light from the spirit will

appear prominently before

oneself.

 

T’aego Pou