I want to
make myself an empty
room: quiet whitewashed walls
with slant sunshine and a fresh
breeze through open
windows.
Posts Tagged → path
things a good man would do
How much freedom
is gained if a man ignores what
his neighbor said or did or intended
and considers only what he himself is doing
and how to make his actions just and right, the
kind of things a good man would do! Don’t let
your attention be caught by the darkness
of others’ movements; just run straight
on the line, with no ungainly
movements.
the proper conduct of relationships
In relationships,
desires lead to misfortune.
Behave with discipline
and balance.
Kuei Mei is concerned with the guidelines for the proper conduct of relationships, whether they be social, romantic, or work related. The image here is of thunder roiling the surface of a lake, and it suggests that relationships can be disturbing to our peace of mind unless they are established and governed under proper principles.
The nature of relationships is that they lead us into the desire state: we begin to desire another, desire recognition, desire retribution, desire a particular outcome in a given situation. All of these desires lead us away from the equanimity that we aim to maintain as students of the I Ching. This hexagram often comes as a sign that you are in danger of sacrificing your composure in an effort to affect a relationship.
When someone does not treat you as you would like, you are faced with a choice as to what to do. While it may be tempting to abandon the relationship in anger or act aggressively to produce a result, neither of these is consistent with proper principles.
You are counseled instead to return to inner independence, acceptance, modestly, and gentleness. The greatest influence is always had through inner discipline and balance; less subtle measures may produce more immediate results, but they are seldom lasting.
This hexagram also teaches us that rushing into a relationship, rushing to resolve a relationship, or rushing to escape a relationship are all akin to rushing on ice: each invites a panful fall. Seek to establish relationships slowly and on proper principles, to allow them to evolve naturally, and to resolve disputes with patience and reserve.
If your primary relationship — that with the Sage — is open and ongoing and devoted, then all other relationships will fall into place.
The I Ching, or Book of Changes
Hexagram 54, Kuei Mei / The Marrying Maiden
ebooks & apps of the Tao the Ching, I Ching,
Wei wu Wei Ching, Hua hu Ching, and
Art of War for iPad/Phone, Kindle,
You
can now buy
the I Ching as part of a
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for iPhone or iPad for less than
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just observe and you’ll laugh aloud
Just look right here.
Don’t seek transcendent enlightenment.
Just observe and observe: suddenly
you’ll laugh aloud.
the wise person teaches by example
When people
find one thing beautiful,
another consequently becomes ugly.
When one man is held up as good,
another is judged
deficient.
Similarly, being and
non-being balance each other;
difficult and easy define each other;
long and short illustrate each other;
high and low rest upon each other;
voice and song meld into harmony;
what is to come follows upon
what has been.
The wise person
acts without effort and teaches
by quiet example. She accepts things as they
come, creates without possessing, nourishes without
demanding, accomplishes without taking credit.
Because she constantly forgets herself,
she is never forgotten.
ebooks & apps of the Tao the Ching, I Ching,
Wei wu Wei Ching, Hua hu Ching, and
Art of War for iPad/Phone, Kindle,
You
can now buy
Tao te Ching as part of a
five-app bundle of Taoist classics
for iPhone or iPad for less than
the cost of one hardcover
book.