meet difficulty with gentleness

jr-art

 

Through

openness and gentleness 

the correct solution is

reached.

 
Arriving at the correct solution to a difficult situation requires a receptivity to inner truth. Unless we are willing to put aside the strong emotions of our egos and devote ourselves to discovering what is right, there can be no hope of progress at this time. Help only comes when we invite it with a sincere and innocent attitude.

The I Ching teaches a simple but effective method of influencing difficult people and arduous situations. It advises us first to lay aside our prejudices – our feelings of being wounded, angry, or in the right – and second to seek to understand the positions of others and the lesson that the Sage is teaching us with the situation. Even when another is truly out of line, it is only be accepting this and remaining balanced that you make it possible for positive change to occur. Gentleness and understanding create in others an unconscious willingness to be led.

The superior person therefore avoids the use of anger and force in trying times, knowing that they only prolong conflict. It is far wiser to accept that each experience we have is necessary for us to learn something about ourselves and about the higher laws of life. The greatest openings come when we meet difficulty with acceptance, gentleness, and a desire to understand the lesson underneath.
 

from The I Ching, or Book of Changes

Hexagram 61 / Chung Fu (Inner Truth)

 

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the perfect means of achieving freedom

sky clouds swimmer

just breathe

 

Without thought, 

without mind, without self, 

there is only freedom. The direct, 

reliable, and perfect means of 

achieving this is to become 

wholly absorbed in 

the breath.

 

Wei wu Wei Ching, Chapter 16

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when stillness pervades your existence

every ongoing prayer for the mighty soul of rory young

 

Calming

your mind, following

your breath, simplifying your life,

you reduce agitation and worry

with each passing

month.

 


When

genuine stillness

pervades your existence,

the subtle universe appears.

Then you can go anywhere you

like and give yourself

just what you

need.

 

Wei wu Wei Ching, Chapter 19

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the mystic develops a wider outlook

like so

 

While some blame

another for causing him harm,

the wise one first takes

himself to task.

 

The worldly struggle is outward struggle. The struggle on the spiritual path is inward struggle. No sooner does one take the spiritual direction than the first enemy one meets is one’s own self. What does the self do? It is most mischievous. When one says one wants to fight it, it says, ‘I am yourself. Do you want to fight me?’ And when it brings failure, it is clever enough to put the blame on someone else.

Do all those who have failed in life accuse themselves? No, they always accuse another person. When they have gained something they say, ‘I have done it.’ When they have lost something they say, ‘This person got in my way’. With little and big things, it is all the same. The self does not admit faults; it always puts the blame on others. Its vanity, its pride, its smallness, and its egotistical tendency which is continually active, keep one blind.

By a study of life the Sufi learns and practices the nature of its harmony. He establishes harmony with the self, with others, with the universe and with the infinite. He identifies himself with another, he sees himself, so to speak, in every other being. He cares for neither blame nor praise, considering both as coming from himself.

If a person were to drop a heavy weight and in so doing hurt his own foot, he would not blame his hand for having dropped it, realizing himself in both the hand and the foot. In like manner the Sufi is tolerant when harmed by another, thinking that the harm has come from himself alone.

He overlooks the faults of others, considering that they know no better. He hides the faults of others, and suppresses any facts that would cause disharmony. His constant fight is with the Nafs (the self-centered ego), the root of all disharmony and the only enemy of man.

The mystic develops a wider outlook on life, and this wider outlook changes his actions. He develops a point of view that may be called a divine point of view. Then he rises to the state in which he feels that all that is done to him comes from God, and when he himself does right or wrong, he feels that he does right or wrong to God. To arrive at such a stage is true religion. There can be no better religion than this, the true religion of God on earth. This is the point of view that makes a person God-like and divine. He is resigned when badly treated, but for his own shortcomings, he will take himself to task, for all his actions are directed towards God.

 

Hazrat Inayat Khan

 

Joan Radcliffe Walker, 11 Aug. 1925 ~ 26 Oct. 2024

Joan Radcliffe Walker completed her journey on earth in the early morning hours of 26 October 2024, passing in peaceful sleep in hospice care. She leaves her daughters Julie Sands Donaldson and Laurie Lysle Walker, her son Brian Browne Walker, three grandchildren, Dylan, Sofia, and Rebecca, and some very good friends.

Joan’s father departed this life when she was 16, so his influence dimmed with time, but the presence of her mother Cynthia Pace Radcliffe entertained and inspired her and remained, until Cincie died at 83, a constant companion and guiding star.

Bud Walker, her husband for 65 years, was the best man anyone could have been married to. Bud died in January 2017.

Not what she attained, but what she learned, motivated Joan’s steps throughout her life: from an emancipated childhood she learned freedom to explore, to mingle, and to fraternize.

From scarcity in her teens she learned to improvise and plan.

From industry in her 20’s, she learned to triumph over difficulties and excel.

From her observation of discrimination and inequities, she realized an ability to access her own powers to intercede for others successfully.

From maturation she learned where her true talents lay, and from living to 99 she learned patience and a peaceful acceptance of life.

In the sum of these lessons she found joy, humor, humility, and gratitude. Life contained hope and purpose to the end.

Rest in peace, Joan, you have lived an exceptional life.

🪷

 

Almost nine years ago, my mother and I sat down at the only dining room table that I’ve ever known in my parents’ home and wrote my father’s obituary together. Soon after, without my knowing about it, she wrote her own. Years later, she gave it to me, and I have carried it with me since. Almost every word of what lies above was written by its subject. 

What I said about my father in italics at the end of his obituary was

 

It is

a signal honor when

the best man one has ever known,

the best friend one has ever had, and

one’s own father are one and the

same man. I love you,

Papa, always and

forever.

 

Change the gender, and what I have to say here is the same — not identical, because they weren’t, but of a feather, as they were. It’s not a sack race, of course. It’s the greatest thing that ever happened to me: I am the son of Bud and Joan Walker.

 

Goodbye,

my beloved mama.

We will never be apart

for so much as

an instant.

 

☯️